Year of Character Development: Thomas

John 20:20-31

After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, ‘Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.’ When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.’

But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, ‘We have seen the Lord.’ But he said to them, ‘Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.’

A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you.’ Then he said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.’ Thomas answered him, ‘My Lord and my God!’ Jesus said to him, ‘Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.’

Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name.

As part of my family’s Easter celebration on Sunday, we scheduled a Zoom call — not an usual way to gather these days.  I imagine many of you did the same. But who could have imagined a year ago that this would be our only option to be together on Easter?  Instead of Easter dinner at my sisters, we were 22 people, each in our own homes, from all over the world on one computer screen. There were perks to this for sure.  Not all of us would have been present if we’d had to actually show up in the same place.  But seeing everyone’s face on the screen is not the same as being in each other’s presence.

We know that’s true for our congregations too.  This virus is horrific, and the collective grief and loss it’s causing — unprecedented, unbearable. Still, there have been some pleasant surprises even in the pain we experience.  Our community has actually expanded since the stay-at-home directive.  I’ve seen names I don’t recognize in the chat section of the screen during our livestream worship services.  I’ve seen names of others who’ve moved to another part of the country, on the other side of the world, and names of those whose faces I’ve missed seeing the last couple of years. 

Families are participating in faith practices at home.  We’ve heard from some that your teenagers are more engaged in worship than they’ve ever been. Young children get excited about preparing the worship space at home before the service begins. 

Others have shared how celebrating Communion has brought renewed beauty to the mystery and power of Christ’s presence that knows no bounds.  These are realities for which we’re grateful. Still we do ache to be in each other’s presence. 

Maybe you, like me, find yourself wondering how much longer will this go on?  When will we get to gather like we used to? When can we go back to familiar ways of meeting up with friends, connecting with neighbors, going to work, visiting the sick, accompanying those who grieve?  I’m feeling weary from our current reality.  How about you?  Everything’s been upended — and there’s no telling what’s ahead.

The disciples find themselves in a similar spot in the story I just read:  Everything’s been upended — and there’s no telling what’s ahead. The disciples are behind locked doors, huddled in fear.  Earlier that day Mary Magdalene had gone to Jesus’ tomb and found it empty.  She ran to get Peter and the other disciple to confirm what she didn’t see.  They also found the tomb empty. Not knowing what to do, they returned home.

Mary, on the other hand, stayed. Grief kept her from moving.  Turns out Jesus was there all along.  She just didn’t recognize him. At first she thought he was the gardener. But when Jesus called her name, she knew it was Jesus, her teacher, her Lord.  He told her to go and tell the others. So she did. And the disciples were afraid. 

Jesus raised from the dead? Not possible. He was crucified.  Dead.  Buried.  End of story. But the tomb is empty! If the dead don’t stay dead… well that changes everything. Now everything’s upended and there’s no telling what’s ahead.

I imagine the disciples wrestling with all the “what ifs” and worst-case-scenarios they can think of about the uncertain future ahead.  Then Jesus shows up.  He reveals himself, gives them his peace, commissions them to share in his ministry, empowering them with the gift of the Holy Spirit. 

Thomas misses the whole thing.  When he’s back with the group, the disciples tell him, just as Mary had told them, “We have seen the Lord!” But their witness isn’t enough. Thomas declares: “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my fingers in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

A week later, they’re gathered again, all together this time, Thomas too. Back in their perceived safe place Jesus shows up again. Jesus gives his peace again.  And for Thomas, Jesus offers something more:  he invites Thomas to touch his wounds that he would be assured he is the risen Lord. We don’t know if Thomas touches Jesus’ wounds or not. The invitation is enough for Thomas to confess, “My Lord and my God!”

Thomas has been known ever since as the disciple who doubted, the one who needed to see in order to believe.  Good news for those of us whose doubts are an active part of our faith. Jesus meets even us with grace.  And maybe that’s the best news of all in this story about a world that’s been upended and we can’t begin to imagine what’s next. 

In one of the more helpful articles that I’ve read recently, Psychologist Leah Corder writes about the one question she’s heard more than any other throughout this pandemic. The question most often posed in the article: “Why Am I So Tired?”

She names our community trauma and grief as contributing factors to our current state of feeling exhausted.  Using science to defend her argument, she describes our brain as a smoke alarm.  

Something has set it off and it’s stuck in the ‘on’ position.  We’re living in a state of on-going perceived threat.  Our bodies and brains are functioning all day long in fire-fighting fight or flight mode, and there’s nothing that we can do to change this for any significant length of time.  We sense danger but we can’t turn off the alarm. 

We’re also experiencing a sudden and collective loss of “normal”.  She writes: “In a matter of days, our lives went from ordinary to being turned upside down. We are collectively grieving the loss of what used to be and what should have been. Seniors are missing their graduations, couples are postponing their weddings, babies are being born to parents who must take them home and quarantine from the family and friends who would otherwise have come to shower the new family with visits and meals and support.”

Everything’s upended and there’s no telling what’s ahead.  There’s only one way forward: grace.

Enter Jesus.  In that closed off room filled with fear, doubt and uncertainty, Jesus finds a way in. Just as no one and nothing has the power to ruin Easter (as Pastor Ben reminded us in his sermon on Sunday), no one and nothing can keep Christ away from us — from you.  He gave his life for you.  He will go to the ends of the earth to offer you his grace and peace.

The disciples hid and locked the doors. But Jesus finds them.  Jesus shows up even as they make every effort to separate themselves from the truth of his resurrection.  

Jesus finds them and meets them with grace.  Jesus doesn’t judge or scold.  He offers his presence and peace.  And then grace upon grace, he blesses them with the gift of the Holy Spirit.  He breathes on them the very breath of God that holds creative power for making all things new. 

Everything is upended and there’s no telling what’s ahead. This was the reality for the disciples.  It’s our reality too. 

But we’re not alone in this. The resurrected Jesus is on the move to find you — wherever you’re at with whatever you’ve got.  Jesus finds you and meets you with his grace. 

And then grace upon grace, he offers you his peace and blesses you with the Holy Spirit.  

So breathe deeply of this truth.  Now and again and again. And may every breath be a reminder that Christ is with you, offers you peace, blesses you with the gift of the Holy Spirit that you would be strengthened in his grace to be shared with others, for the sake of the world.